A State of Flux : How to Deal with Change

I’ve been in a state of flux since my return from South Korea. Things have been changing very quickly and I haven’t had much time to pause and process anything at all. It’s always been go, go, go. This makes me anxious, tired, and unmotivated, because I don’t know what I’m doing anymore. It often feels like I’m making impulsive decisions not because I’m impulsive, but because  I don’t have enough time to ponder every decision that I need to make.

In the midst of this, there are so many voices inserting inputs on what I should do and what I should’ve done. The noises get so loud that I can’t even hear my own voice anymore. I feel stuck trying to make everyone happy. In the end, I ended up neglecting myself and losing myself.

But in difficult times of change, you really get to see who will stand by you and who will support you to the end. Even though they may insert their unsolicited advices or inputs, it ultimately comes from a place of care and love. They want you to do your best and to come out of the other side successful. However, it’s up to you to filter through the noise to get to the core of your soul to find what it is you need to do for yourself.

No matter how well prepared you are for major changes in your life, you’ll never be prepared for how they’ll make you feel. If you’re in a state of flux and are struggling to process it, here is a list of reminders to help you through this time of change.

  1. When we ask for courage, it’s not courage we receive, but opportunities to have courage; when we ask for love, it’s not love we receive, but opportunities to love; when we ask for strength, it’s not strength we receive, but opportunities to show strength.
  2. Focus your energy on creating the new, not on fighting the change. Change is inevitable, so embrace it.
  3. Change is the only constant.
  4. Change is uncomfortable but there is no growth in comfort.
  5. Be proactive, not reactive, and take charge of your life.
  6. Remember that you once prayed for the things you have now.
  7. Do what is right and don’t act upon emotions, emotions are not constant.
  8. The only thing you can control is you.
  9. Don’t let your emotions get the best of you. Don’t say things you don’t mean and don’t do things you’ll regret because you’re upset at the moment.
  10. Take a time out when you need to. It’s okay if you need to take a moment (or lots of moments) to process everything you’re going through. Change is hard, take all the time you need, but also remember to keep moving forward.
  11. Forgive yourself. Let your mistakes be lessons to grow from, not to tie you down.
  12. Choose your mental and emotional well-being above all else. When you are a healthy and wholesome person, you can contribute so much more to the world.

Change can be a little scary because you’re now entering uncharted territory, but that’s also where growth and self-discovery is, so be brave.

I hope that some of these points resonated with you. If you have ways to help yourself through times of change–whether that’s career change, life change, personal changes, or any other sort of changes–please share them with me in the comment section. I would love to hear from you.

Love,
Thao

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